Our First Holiday Season

Chanukah came early this year. It started BEFORE Thanksgiving. Crazy? Right? 

So we celebrated. Duh. 

We lit candles each night - first time we didn't miss a single night. And Eliana was enamored with the candles. We lit them with dinner each night. She watched them the entire time she ate.  

We hope your holidays were as wonderful as ours. 

While Eliana and I are Jewish, Matt is not. So we celebrate Christmas with Matt and his extended family. 

Like I explained about Thanksgiving, Matt's family celebrates the weekend before. This was that wonderful weekend in December with 70 degree weather. So yes, Matt & Eliana are walking in the woods in a T-shirt. So we went to the shore to celebrate at Matt's uncle & aunt's house with the whole extended family. We got there early to spend some extra time playing outside in the park. Someone LOVES the swing!

We play games. Sometimes trivia. Sometimes funny. This year we played reindeer antlers. One team member had to wear nylons on his head with the toes cut off. And they rest of us filled them to make antlers. I'm filled with hot air, so our team won!

Unfortunately, we weren't going to be around on actual Christmas day. So we celebrate as a family on Sunday. We attempted to go to Church with Linda (someone's nap got in the way). And then came home for lunch and presents. We didn't really do presents for Eliana for Chanukah, so this was new. 

Eliana watched Matt intently as he "helped" her open her gifts. 

We have a favorite book around here. Nana found it while we were walking around NYC over the summer. Dinosaur v. Bedtime is a crowd pleaser around these parts. And Lauren & Phil gave us the next book in the series, Dinosaur v. Library. Let me just tell you ~ AMAZING!!!!!! We are in so much love.

Christmas is a strange holiday. I hate all the commercialization that has happened in the last few decades. I hate listening to Christmas music before Thanksgiving. But I love the actually holiday. I do enjoy going to church with Linda. 

And this time of the year will be very complicated in 2014. Eliana will be old enough to ask questions and wonder why we are celebrating both holidays. How do you say that everyone believes something a little different, but that is also really complicated. and that it's okay because we support each other's differences. And that we believe one thing and Daddy believes something different but we can celebrate all together. Wish us luck! 

We hope that your holidays were filled with family, love, and happiness. We hope that they holidays were exactly what you wanted from them. And maybe a little more. 

A Super Cute Sink Moment

Who needs words to explain this??? 

I don't think she likes bath time very much 

Seriously cute. Every time she takes a bath. 

Thanksgiving 2013

You know Thanksgiving is a big deal in our house. I mean, Matt's world almost collapsed the year we married because our wedding canceled all our Thanksgiving plans. We had to make an impromptu Thanksgiving on a school night in order to restore order to the world.

So like in previous years, we celebrated three times. But unlike those same years, I only cooked ONE TURKEY this year. Now if your remember last year, you'll remember the fiasco with trying to find a turkey. This year, I went into the store for my birds (I assumed I would be getting two again) and asked for 2- 15 pounders, and he came back with 2- 30 pounders! WHERE WERE YOU LAST YEAR?!?!?!?! for real.

Anyways. We went home and played with the bird. Her name was Bertha. You know I don't like fondling anyone I don't know. So names are important when you put your hands under the skin. Which is the first thing you should do with the bird.

Back to my story. Our story. Whatever. First Thanksgiving is always Friends-giving. An afternoon spent with our friends (duh), turkey, and drinking. It's amazing that a few years ago, the first year that we hosted this event, we were all up until at least 2 in the morning having a wonderful time. And in the four years since, I think everyone has left by 10... babies. What can you do. They change things.

Our next Thanksgiving was with Matt's family. It was nice to see all the family. All the Uncles & Aunts & cousins. (side note, why are adults capitalized and cousins not - or is that just me...whatever). Not important. I digress.

Matt's Grandmother was a genius. She had 4 boys. They all grew up and got married. And that's when his Grandmother demonstrated her genius. She decided they would celebrate major holidays the weekend before. That way on the actual holiday, the boys could be with their wives' families. No trying to decide which family they were going to celebrate with. Amazing. Thank you Grand-mommy. You made all our families happier places.

Our final Thanksgiving, is Thanksgiving. We try to spend Wednesday night with Linda, Phil, and Lauren. This year there was awful weather. It was one of those storms. So we didn't make it. We were sad to have missed them. Thursday we got up and finally got on the road. We stopped by Linda's for a hug and a kiss. And then we spent the next 7 hours making that 4 hour drive.


When we finally made it to CT, we spent the weekend hanging out with Grandparents & Great Grandparents. Aunts and Uncle. (again with the caps???)

Four Generations of Stone Women

This year we are thankful for:

• Eliana
• our health
• our families
• our friends
• not feeling like we had to give up our lives when Eliana was born
• making time for ourselves
• friends we have made through Eliana
• making smart decisions - for our family, for our stomachs, in our jobs
• how fast Amazon ships 

FIRST SNOW!!!

Oh snow! How I love you! Through a window. With a beautiful warm roaring fire in front of me.

December 2013

 Cuddling with my sweethearts!

 

We spent a lot of time watching Daddy outside and the dogs pee on the porch. 

She was intrigued. She enjoyed sitting in the snow. And then she touched it. And she no longer enjoyed the snow so much. 

I'm sorry for the radio silence.

And that's serious. I am sorry. I have missed you. I have missed writing. So, because I know you missed me back, I have decided to stop posting forever.























JK! It was a joke. Calmate! (that's calm down for the less language inclined, or reclined like I am right now). For reals. 4 posts coming by the end of January. Including but not limited to: Thanksgiving, Chanukah, Christmas, Cancun, and birthday cupcakes. Oh look at that. ITS 5! Oh yea and a couple of monthly posts. I think I owe you 9 and 10. Maybe even 8. Oh, man, I am horrible at this. How about a picture to make up for it?

Our First Halloween

OOOOOO. First Halloween has come and gone. And the pictures are tooooo cute for words!

We had two Halloween experiences.
First, with the Mommy Group!

Look at all those cute babies!

And then on Halloween. Amber came over with her little Monkey. So cute.

Can you stand the cutesness?!?!?!?!

7 Months

Month 6

Weight: 16 lbs. 14 oz.          70 percentile
Height: 27.75 inches            97 percentile       Weight to Height - 15 percentile

Head: 44 cm.                       85 percentile

Month 7

Weight: 19 lbs. 

Skills

• Oh I don't even know.
• Eliana talks all the time. 
• Eliana eats everything. 
• And really? It's all about the pictures. 

Are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?!?!?!?!?

At Eliana's 4 month appointment, everything was going well, or so I thought...

I love our pediatric practice. As a WHOLE they are wonderful. They can calm me down quickly and answer my questions. When the person I am talking to doesn't know the answer, she goes and finds it. I like them. Matt came with us to the first few appointments and picked out a Dr. that he felt comfortable with. She is nice, and very young. Not like Doogie Howser level young, but sometimes she feels like that.

Anyway. Back to our little story. Something wasn't right. Doc wasn't talking. She was just kinda doing the same thing over and over again. And then she said she would be right back with another Doc. She has done this before, and I am okay with it. She wants to make sure the information she is giving us is correct. I appreciate it. Doc #2 came in and did the same things Doogie Howser did. Then they both left. Eliana and I started to make fun of them. And have fun - like we do.

Doc came back in and said that Doc #2 confirmed her suspisicions. There is a SMALL chance that Eliana might have Down Syndrome.

WHAT?!?!?!

COME AGAIN!

JK. I didn't actually freak out. I was more shocked than anything else. I mean, we had the test when I was pregnant to check for Downs, even though I didn't care at all about the outcome, just wanted to see my baby again. I never in a million years would have terminated the pregnancy if she had Down Syndrome. I just wanted another fancy sonogram. I wanted to see her beautiful face.

So I started asking questions. Doc told me that it was because of a few things.
1 - Eliana wasn't standing up assisted. When you hold her up she doesn't put her feet down.
2 - Her tongue is always sticking out.
3 - Her muscle definition is loose.

So then I responded.
1 - Of course she isn't standing up, no one told me she was supposed to. SO why would I make her.
2 - I am the runt of my family when it comes to tongue length, and I can touch my nose. My brother's tongue was out until he was much older.
3 - SHE IS 4 MONTHS OLD! Of course her muscle definition is loose. She doesn't go to the GYM! what was I thinking!!!

Doc explained that had our positions been switched, she would want to know that there is a small chance that her child might be on the MOSAIC for Down Syndrome. Mosaic? Is that like the spectrum for Autism? Nope, its a mosaic. IDK.

She told me that there was a number I could call and they would come to the house and do a full physical, emotional, and mental exam to confirm. Or I could do blood work. On a FOUR month old. Right. So I asked the Doc, "Does she look like she has Downs?" "No."

The whole reason Doc told me this was "in case" she does have Downs. She didn't want me to be shocked or surprised if it showed up on her blood work later on.

So I went home. And told Matt. He wanted to call and make appointments and get her checked out, etc. I said sure. I will make the call. And the next day, Eliana started putting her feet down and standing up. And we never did anything about it.

Fast forward 2 months. To her 6 month appointment. I took her alone again, and we purposely saw the same Doc as before. We went through the motions and all the regular stuff. Then at the end of the appointment Doc said "You remember all that stuff about the possibility of Down Syndrome? Yea, I don't think there is any chance she has it." My response? "I know."

Every friend and family member I told this story to was appalled by Doc's behavior. And rightfully so. Had this been any other parent, especially a FIRST TIME PARENT, everything about how they raise that child would have changed. Most parents would start looking at this child as special or disabled. Doc was lucky it was me in the room that day. And she is lucky I don't have an interest in suing her. She could have completely derailed our relationship and damaged our family. Just in case.

Never once did I suspect that Doc knew what she was talking about. Never once did I suspect that my daughter might have Down Syndrome. It was not in the realm of possibility. So no.

In fact, I was more upset this past week by how much her butt her because of her diarrhea. Which was MY FAULT because I fed her carrots - and she is clearly still allergic.

Moral of this story? I am going to see Doc once more at 9 months. And I am going to talk to her about her decision to say "might" and "possibility" because any other parent would have freaked out. And then, I think we are going to switch Docs in the practice. No worries, there are 8 others to pick from and I have liked almost all of them.

L'Shana Tova

I have to confess, in my family I am the most secular Jew. They might not know it, but it is how I feel. I do not actively seek out my Judaism on a regular basis, nor do I participate in being Jewish. We do not light the Shabbat candles every Friday night. We do not attend services. We are not members of a congregation or the JCC. I am Jewish, it is just part of me. Like saying I have brown hair. It is just factual information.

As I was sitting in temple last month for Rosh Hashanah services I was struck by the amount of community I am missing by not being more involved. I was sitting in services, by myself, when a couple sat down next to me. She introduced herself and started talking to me about the synagogue. She engaged me in her community. She could have left me alone, but she didn't. Then, the president spoke about how the synagogue as a community needs to be looking out for the new people and the people who are not yet involved in their community. And I felt like she was talking to me. She said L'Shana Tova means Happy New Year, and I knew that, we say it every year. Then she said that L'Shana comes from the same root as  L'Shanot, change. Let Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur serve as a moment of decisive change in your life. 

It resonated with me. 

It happened again at Kol Nidrei services. Kol Nidrei is a prayer for those who cannot pray. It is the community asking forgiveness for those who cannot ask for themselves. A different couple sat down next to me and we began to talk about the Rabbis and Cantors. A former student sat down with her family behind me and engaged me for fifteen minutes before the service and again afterwards. They asked if I was a member, and when I said I wasn't, they asked if I had enjoyed myself. No pressure to join. Just make sure you still get involved in the yearly programs. 

It resonated with me again. Like listening to the shofar sound. The universe is talking to me. I miss prayer. I miss being involved in the temple. I miss being an active participant in my Judaism.

And in the last month, I have thought about it a lot. And I have started looking into the Temple. I have started doing the research. I have started making plans for us and for our household. My hope for this New Year is that the "little" change Eliana has been (little in size, not the change) will continue until we can fill the void. Let me take these feelings seriously and act on them. Let me make changes that last. May this year be a Happy New Year and a Year filled with Happy Changes.


On a similar and different note. My goal this year is to forgive those who hurt me. I want to not take offense as quickly or as deeply. I want to learn how to let it go better and faster. There was a prayer in the Kol Nidrei service that really stuck with me - even now a month later.

Give us the grace to show forbearance to those who offend against us. When the wrongs and injustices of others wound us, may our hearts not despair of human good. May no trial, however severe, embitter our souls and destroy our trust. When beset by trouble and sorrow, our mothers and fathers put on the armor of faith and fortitude. May we too find strength to meet adversity with quiet courage and unshaken will. Help us to understand that injustice and hate will not forever afflict the human race; that righteousness and mercy with triumph in the end. 

There are people we live with, work with, are friends by association with, who drive us up the wall. In a high school, I work with bullies on a regular basis, whether student or adult. I am tired of it. I am looking for my armor of faith and fortitude as well as the quiet courage and unshaken will to stand up for what I believe is right. More importantly, I want to stop focusing on the wrongs done to me. I want to be able to focus on all the positive things that happen during the day. I want to change my focus. I want to focus on the change. 

6 Months

Month 5

Weight: 16 lbs. 4 oz.

Month 6

Weight: 16 lbs. 14 oz.          70 percentile
Height: 27.75 inches            97 percentile       Weight to Height - 15 percentile

Head: 44 cm.                       85 percentile

Skills

• Eliana can sit. All by herself. CRAZY. She started the month wobbling, but can now stabilize herself while sitting. She sat for an hour on the floor this afternoon unassisted. And while she is down there she reaches and plays with toys. Anything she can get her hands on and then into her mouth. I can sit her on the floor and wash dishes and she stays put. It's crazy how fast she is growing.
• Solids. They are AMAZING! Eliana loves to eat (not surprising). She loves green beans, squash, and sweet potatoes. Carrots were iffy at best. She ate apples too many days in a row and the acid did a number on her tush. Bananas, pears, and peaches have been hits as well. She tolerates oatmeal, and more if I add fruits to it. She has also started eating a little meat in her purees. She will eat almost anything it seems. Good.  
• Eliana loves daycare. She loves sitting with the other babies and talking to them. She also loves all the noisy toys she doesn't have at all. I felt bad, and bought her two for at home... When I pick her up in the afternoon she gives Marilyn a hug and then reaches for me. It makes the whole day worth it. I think once of my favorite parts is when other children come and say goodbye to her when we leave. 
• WORDS. They have started! Dada happened this morning!!! Not directed at Matt, but still said out loud. Da da da da da da da da. And sticking her tongue out to spit.
• Eliana has been chewing on our fingers for weeks. Then two weeks ago, she was chewing on my finger, and it hurt. There was something sharp in there. She wouldn't let me look at it for a few days. But once I did, there were TWO TEETH hanging out right there in front! Just waiting to say hello. She never complained about them coming in or had a fever. It was more of a surprise to me than anything else. 
• We have been trying to get her to nap in her crib. Last weekend, I fought her for two hours and then I finally won. It has been lovely to have her nap in her own room, away from the noise. In fact, it is that skill that is allowing me to write right now. 

Long and short of it is. these first six months have gone by so very quickly. I miss my itty bitty baby girl. But I adore the big girl who smiles, giggles, and plays with me. I cannot remember what my life was like without her. And I don't really want to. She has been the best gift ever. (I hope I remember this moment in 14 years....)

5 Months

Another month has come and gone. And our baby girl has gotten much bigger and smarter! 

Month 4

Weight: 13 lbs. 14 oz.

Month 5

Weight: 16 lbs. 4 oz.

Skills

• Eliana can sit. She is still wobbling and needs to be propped a little bit. But she has always preferred sitting up to laying in your arms like a baby. Now she will only lay down in your arms if you are feeding her; and even then, maybe not. Sit me up! 
• Solids. They are AMAZING! Eliana loves to eat. (not surprising) She loves green beans, squash, and sweet potatoes. I can't figure out how much I should be feeding her, because she wants to eat the entire container, every time!
• Eliana laughed for the first time this month. She was watching her cousins jump up and down and she thought it was hysterical. She has also laughed at Misty and Bones barking. 
• Rolling still happens. In both directions. Any time she wants. 

Colorado - a Stone vacation

Oh I'm sorry. This is over a month old. What's worse, is that I started it so long ago, and thought I finished it, and never looked back....so sad. So where the beginning and then where I left off...

Like we do, we were home for two days between the Reese family vacation and leaving for the Stone family vacation. We were home long enough to unpack, do laundry, and pack again.

This trip was Eliana's first trip on an airplane. And she was such a champ! We were more nervous. We had a second diaper bag packed with us in case we were stuck on the airplane, but we didn't need it. Our flight out to Colorado was about 4 hours and left at 11 so we kept her up all morning and she fell asleep as the plane was boarding. She slept right through take off. At dinner point she woke up and played with us, ate, then fell back asleep. We fed her again during landing. In case you're curious, yes the front bathroom had a fold down thing to change her diaper. However, if she was any longer she would have been touching both walls.

So Colorado. Matt wanted to drive over Independence Pass. It is beautiful but scary. It is a two lane road, most of the way, that hugs the side of the mountain. And our ears popped a few times on the way up, which made it hell for Eliana. She was fussy the whole way. But it was a beautiful drive, and less scary than I remember it from my childhood. 

Ashcroft - a ghost town

While we were in Aspen we had a wonderful time. The whole family was there. We went to the music a few times, took some nice walks and hikes, went out for Sarah's birthday dinner. (see this is where having done this a month ago would have been helpful - good thing I have pictures!!!!)

We went hot air ballooning for Sarah's birthday

And we listened to music on top of Ajax Mountain. 

And we went on the swing for the first time. It was a hit!